Bloody Women

Last month I removed myself from the Australian electoral roll. I had heard that Rudd was about to introduce legislation to apply retrospective income tax for returning residents and this was the clearest way to demonstrate my non-resident status.

Then Rudd gets kicked out.

Then we get our first female PM (finally) who also happens to be my favourite sitting member. (No filthy puns please Cheesel). She's no Paul Keating, mind, but still great.

Then she calls an election today. Our first evah female PM goes to our first evah female GG to request a double dissolution.

And here's me - a lifetime of taking my voting and my feminism seriously - now unable to vote for a female PM that I admire.

It's not fair. And it's all my someone else's fault.

I have a small loophole ... the enrolment de-listing forms weren't technically signed by me. They were forged on my behalf by a pensioner with cheap make-up and bad hair. If I'm prepared to rat her out then I will be able to vote. She may wind up in the big house while I'll be living it up in the polling booth. It's very, very tempting.

It's only fair, in fact. What to do? I think I'll sleep on it.

And as for you old girl ... sleep with one eye open. That's the price you pay for committing crimes against the Australian public.