I don't know how it happened or where it all went so wrong.
It started with a nice dinner. I ordered soda water and looked smugly across to R as he asked for a Long Island Iced Tea. We always pronounce it "Long Iceland" ... due to a recent decision to fuck up their English as pettry revenge for not understanding my accent in Vietnamese. Other examples (there are many) include pronouncing the "ch" in hierarchy, ordering "coffee latte" or calling the bill a "bin", which is how it would be pronounced in Vietnamese.
Then on to the belly dancing night at the local bar (skinny Vietnamese belly dancers, don't knock it till you've suffered it). This ended at about 1am, with the waiter sitting there drinking a beer with us while ignoring other customers who were asking for the bill.
Then onwards we rode to another bar where I found myself in a group speaking German.
Next up, I am following someone on a motorbike through dark streets, while doubling a 110kg bald Australian man on my bike. He talked a lot but whenever I contributed to the conversation the bike got the death wobbles.
Fast forward and I'm on a boat. A boat! R had a little spew over the side on his way to the toilet, although I think I'm the only one that noticed.
Next thing I know, I'm standing there (actually swaying there) waiting patiently for the bike parking lady to SLOWLY give me ALL my change. (Doesn't matter how drunk I am - my maths never leaves me.)
I'm waking up at 9am because I forgot to turn the airconditioning on and I'm sweating. I look around and there is a trail of clothes leading to my bed ... like a drunken Hansel.
Why why why why why?
