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23 July 2009

Off the shelf

I bought 100 valiums at the pharmacy this evening. 4 people assisted me in the purchase, with 2 more supervising from a 3 metre distance.

After I nauseated at the herbal remedies on offer (Valerian and Melatonin are for amateurs) they brought me to the pharmacist. 3 of my assistants stayed around to help watch.

The pharmacist went out the back, grabbed a bottle and returned.

"This will work." She said. It was a bottle of Valium. My heart lept.

"What is this feeling?" I asked myself.

"Must be love," I told myself.

My seasoned eyes checked the label. It was 2mg.

"Do you have 5mg?"

"All sold out. But I'll get you some generic Diazepam, 5mg."

She returned with a tray of 10 Stesolid tablets, whose primary ingredient was clearly listed as Diazepam.

I nodded approval and she up-sold me a box of 100.

I'm starting to warm to Jakarta.

I think Jakarta is starting to warm to me.

When I got back to the hotel I took 2.

As an afterthought, I thought I'd check the drug in Google and see it was OK. Here is the first result:

"Stesolid is a rectal brand of diazepam ..." (See for yourself.)

Oh.

... dear.