I'm still in Jakarta this lonely Friday night and stressed about waking up in time for my 6am flight - which is the only route back to Hanoi.
Ordering 2 or 3 glasses of wine while sitting at a bar is normal. Dining alone in a restaurant and nodding at the suggestion of a second glass is just plain polite. But when it's room service it feels naughty. Lacking in willpower. Or friends. It makes me feel like wrapping the glasses in brown paper bags and heading to the lobby to beg.
Nevertheless, for the second night in a row I have asked room service to bring 2 glasses of red wine with my meal.
Last night was awkward. He wheeled in the trolley, flipped it up into a round table and started to set up 2 dinner places: one for each drinker. He promptly realised that there was only one alcoholic in residence this evening (sir) and discretely unset the second place before filling two adjacent glasses.
I have a different plan for tonight. When I hear the knock on the door I'm going to duck into the bathroom and turn the shower on. The room service waiter will think there someone is there (justifying the 2 glasses) and set up a second place for my imaginary dining companion. I'm also going to steal the extra fork, knife and napkin. Lying is a slippery slope.
Epilogue
The shower trick didn't work at all. He was the same waiter as last night ... so just laid out the one place. As I saw him out I yelled "food's here" through the bathroom door to my imaginary friend. He wasn't fooled. I'm sure I detected a smirk as he bon appetited me.
EpiEpilogue
I just looked in the mirror. To my horror, the moisturiser I applied a couple of hours ago has not soaked in. I must have greeted my waiter in a white, caking face bask. This - not my shower ruse - may explain his smirk.
