Bottom Of The Barrel

On a conference call this morning. There were about 10 people on the call, from all around the region:

Me: "Kurniawan are you in the office this morning? You can come to my desk for this call."

K: "No. At home today."

Me: "Are you sick or something?"

K: "Diarrhoea. From the bottom. [announced to the world] I don't know how I got it, you know? But a lot of diarrhoea. So I can't come to work"

It also reminded me of when I first met Kurniawan, earlier this year. We were having lunch with J, one of our new consultants visiting from Singapore:

Me: "Actually, Kurni, I heard your wife just had a baby?" [The previous week I'd been approached to sign a card and eat some cake.]

J: "Congratulations! So how many children do you have?"

K: "Yes. New baby just last month. We have 4 kids now."

J: "Wow. 4 kids. That's a handful."

K: "We only wanted 3 and my wife is having the IUD for 6 years already then suddenly this. The IUD not working. It was working fine for 6 years so now after 3 boys we have a girl. You know even with IUD you can never be sure."

As a topic of conversation, there is nothing lurid or shocking about contraception. It's just a little awkward to introduce it early into a business relationship.

Google Google Google

Gmail just popped up with this when I pressed the send button.

They were right.

And I was impressed.

Oh So Pretty. Vacant.

There are no words to describe America's most famous child circus performer, whose repertoire is as vast as it is popular.

Her Vegas showgirl routine must make the paedophiles go wild - especially now that Justin Bieber is a bit long in the tooth.

This is it: dolly: her:

I don't see a "showgirl" here. The make-up is way too funereal.

I only see a pillow and a noose.

Because JonBenét Ramsey wrecked it for everyone.

Fontaine, Je Ne Boirai Pas De Ton Eau

The mystery is somewhat solved.

A body was found in the fountain.

And it wasn't mine. Still doesn't explain the continued military presence.

Best Thing About Murdering Osama No 1

We all went up a notch on the "FBI Most Wanted" list.

Free Lunch

I've just had my first refusal for lunch.

We were looking out the window at all the military and my colleague said it was probably a tip-off from intelligence that something was going down.

I shared my fears about being the only visible foreigner working in this building. I also joked that it's not safe to have lunch with me. He laughed loudly before gently refusing my invitation.

"Oh no Anthony I'm not having lunch today I think."

Sure.

Le Chair à Canon

In today's news:

"INDONESIA is bracing itself for retaliatory terrorist acts aimed at Westerners ... Security forces in the world's most populous Muslim nation, already on edge following the discovery 10 days ago of a plot to blow up a church in Jakarta, as well as other recent terrorism threats, are now expected to remain on high alert ... We advise Australians in areas likely to be affected by such gatherings to exercise enhanced vigilance regarding their personal security."

As the only white person in our central Jakarta office, I am not loving this paragraph.

Seeing a LOT of military hanging around central Jakarta today is likewise confounding. Even imore military than when the president has dinner at the Grand Hyatt.

Turn-off to Grand Indonesia Mall

The Kempinski Hotel

Approaching the fountain

As I arrived at work this morning our building security guards seemed extra kind although their smiles were wary. "You all know lobby fodder when you see it," I thought to myself as I smiled back.

Later I asked my boss about it and he said that body had been found somewhere near the office and I imagined myself in 3 days time, kneeling in front of a camera with a UN rice sack tied loosely around my head while reading a statement of guilt.

It's going to be tough to find someone to have lunch with me today ...

Reprisals Reschmisals

Not looking forward to this at all.

Wish me luck.