1. Over At The Frankenstein Place, Plaza Indonesia
There is no bookstore anywhere near this sign.
I walk past it every day and know the area well.
Moreover, there is no Lifehouse Bookstore listed in the Store Directory.
Each morning at least 3 cleaners will stop and pause in my honour. The process starts long before I pass them: as the cleaner sees me coming far in the distance ... she or he will abruptly halt, lean, stare and make eye contact ... as I get within striking distance they smile while slowly nodding and saying "Pagi Pak"
It can also be used as a warning sign: like a gangrenous stump on a cigarette packet.
I blame the cleaner. The cleaners in this mall are very easily distracted. They as much time stopping and leaning against the mop, as they do on the mopping.
I walk through this mall on my way to work.
("
Good morning sir"
) ...
this gaze is maintained as I pass by and it feels like parental supervision.
When it first started happening I assumed these cleaners just hoping to see the fat white cunt slip over. Now I realise it's standard Indonesian politeness. "Toto, I've a feeling we're not in Vietnam anymore."
Back to the sign. One of these cleaners probably just plonked it down a few weeks ago while supervising a passing office worker. She must have moved on to some other task and never came back. Or, given that the Lifehouse Bookstore sounds like a Christian shop this could be a new style of terrorism, where the infidels are left dazed and confused.
2. Starbucks, Plaza Indonesia
Indonesians avoid conflict and have a very roundabout way of giving an opinion, using copious amounts of small talk and metaphor.
Nevertheless, surely there are nicer ways to provide feedback.
3. Baby On Board
This all looks so creepy. I felt I was Angelina Jolie as I walked passed it.
Romania Angelina, not Africa Angelina.
For one, this inscription is bullshit. Everyone knows that wings are useless for carrying things (Twin Towers, anyone?).
Or that a tub of chicken wings will make you heavy (man boobs, anyone?).
This tattoo may be the best that this parlour can offer.
5. Hati-hati, Prambanan, Yogyakarta
Why do I love this sign? Because it's so careless.
"If we don't know how to put up a sign properly, good luck on our stairs. "
6. Adisucipto Airport, Yogyakarta,
A lot of cheap Indonesian ice creams in here but not a single Magnum.
Unilever must be tickled pink with the results of their Indonesian advertising spend.
7. Suits and Ties and Porn and Violence
This sign appeared on a wall at our office, next to the area undergoing renovations.
Patience my arse. This is a pervert magnet.
