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30 January 2011

Unas Fotos Por La Semana


A few photos from last week, in no particular theme or order.

1. Naming Weekness
29/01/2011, Grand Indonesia Mall


I dunno. It just seems like an odd name for a store, is all. It's not telling us anything about the clothes, except that they can be worn on any day. Or purchased on any day. Who can tell?

This ain't no accident of English, neither. There's no way to fuck this up in Google Translate, or a dictionary. I suspect that the owners just don't like workshops.


2. Wherever You Are
23/01/2011, Social House at Harvey Nichols


An "internal outing" seems like an odd turn of phrase.

They are probably heading out to the botanical gardens for some Monday larks. As in Vietnam, Indonesians like playing odd games with their work chums on days off.

There are quite a few gay waiters at Social House. I imagine them at the Gardens being singled out. Their colleagues are standing around them in a in a circle, pointing and laughing as they are forced to fess up.


3. Ambiguity
26/01/2011, Blowfish Kitchen And Bar


What ever happened to the man in the top hat? I liked him.

This one seems wrong.

It got creepier when the waiter followed me in and stood there watching, waiting until I finished washing my hands.

I also felt awkward as he handed me some paper towels ... and as he started tearing out more from the dispenser ... I politely declined a second helping.


4. "Taking Care" Of The Children
27/01/2011, Eastern Promise Pub & Restaurant


This was my understanding of children's cancer:
  1. Most people think it's a very bad thing to happen - less so to other people's families.
  2. Many people - mostly hippies wearing purple scarves - have set up charities to help these children with cancer.
  3. The charities tend to raise their money by slapping the photo of a bald child onto a large metal mug.
  4. The hippies hang around various parks and thoroughfares, smiling as they rattle their mug at strangers.
  5. The charities spend this money on medical research and Disneyland.
So get this.
  1. Rival charities appear to have popped up.
  2. Unlike their nemeses, these charities try to give the children cancer.
  3. The charities are probably not run by hippies. It's more likely that these are followers of Wanda Holloway and her lot.
  4. The charities have become so popular that they even have a support group ...
  5. And a poster ...
  6. And some crap snacks. (Probably carcinogenic.)

5. Nothing to do with El Al
25/01/2011, Ranch Market, Plaza Indonesia


It's very reassuring to discover that this ice - made from water - is considered Halal.

I wasn't entirely convinced about Halal so I checked it out on wikipedia. I needn't have worried beause it's true. Even Muslims are allowed both water and ice. Lucky devils.


6. Essence of Chicken Ginseng Slurry
28/01/2011, Meeting Room At The Office


Last week was a very, very long and stressful work week for us. It was filled with client negotiation meetings which went well beyond midnight, followed by homework for us which was due the next 8am. More on that fuckedness later.

On Friday morning my colleague presented me with this green and yellow box.

"Anthony drink this. You need it."

-- "What is it Andri?"

"It's for energy. We are all very tired. You need for energy."

This is a very popular energy drink in Indonesia. You buy it at the chemist and everyone swears by it.

I opened the box and pulled out the short, wide, glass bottle in it. It was filled with some odd brown liquid and
reminded me of an obese eye dropper
. If dirty was a colour, this would be it.

-- "Let me see ... it says 'Essence of Chicken' ... with Ginseng ... what the hell is in this stuff?"

"It's so good for you ... and nice too ... oh Anthony you always asking ... so just drink it lah"

As with most things offered to me in liquid or powder form, if someone mentions energy or happiness I ingest first and think later.

So I did.

I gulped it down obediently, trying to avoid contact with my tongue. Like a whore angling for a tip.

This tasted far, far worse than it looked. What could I do? So I did what any Indonesian would do: I made eye contact and smiled.