Fakebook

Some hackers have all the luck. Others pick on Natasha.

This story is supposed to be about how unlucky Natasha Cann was when targetted for a little bit of FaceFraud. It is actually about how very unlucky Natasha is. Not just in Facebook but in life.

Here are the inputs to Natasha's recent crisis:

- she has 400 Facebook friends

- Natasha's Facebook profile is hacked

- a severe personal catastrophe is communicated to all of her Facebook friends

- an urgent "life or death" request for cash is made

- each friend asked to contribute $10,000 to avert possible catastrophe

- potentially, $4 million in contributions

These are the outputs:

- 400 friends contacted and begged for mercy

- 11 friends bothered to check with phone calls (2.75% uptake)

- 1 donation (0.25% response rate)

- $1000 raised (.025% cash response)

If I were Natasha, there is no way I would publish these results.

Corey Worthingtonette

Probably enough said.

But.

Also.

She doesn't look too guilty.

Although that skirt could get 25 years.

And.

My favourite quote is from her lawyer:

"It was wrong to 'lump' the factors of alcohol, speed and undress together as amounting to gross negligence."

Here, here.

Hair Today

If you are a potato living in Hanoi, every few months you will emerge with a very bad haircut. It's guaranteed.

It usually results in 3-5 days where you start conversations with a "Before you say anything, I don't need any comments about my hair OK?"

Not me though. I haven't had my hair cut here. I'm badly in need of one but I don't know anywhere "safe" to go.

After R's latest outcome from what is (supposedly) the best salon in Hanoi, I'm not convinced that any viable options exist for me. He strutted up to dinner one Saturday night looking like a 1950's schoolboy (side part 'nall). I was gobsmacked. I don't think his dopey grin or ugly shirt could be legally considered the hairdresser's fault, but I would still claim them as consequential damages.

Then again, I'm with Robert Louis Stevenson:

“Everybody, sooner or later, sits down to a banquet of consequences.”

Or Mark Twain:

“To succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence.”

But I am not R. I am left with but one hair option: my kitchen scissors.

I started this morning. I hacked a little bit off the back after my shower. I've decided that I am going to work my way through it gradually and see what comes out the other end.

Clearly, this is a plan that can't fail. Can. Not. Fail.

Either way, if I am forced to live with a bad haircut then I'd rather the money stayed in my pocket.