Night Three in Bangkok ...

... and off I went to Thai Boxing.

Yes, Muay Thai. มวยไทย.

I went there with J. He had already bought a ticket and I caved in to peer pressure. A lack of social alternatives can do strange things to a person ... just ask William Golding.

I hate violent sports but given I went to the girly bars on Wednesday night I thought ... well ... "what the hey". May as well scratch my arse and spit into the sawdust with the rest of them.

The ticket said that it started at 18:30. Luckily the hotel told us not to go until about 20:30 when the adults get into it. Until then, I think it starts at kindergarten and works its way up.

Needless to say we arrived at 20:15 and they still looked pretty young. (Actually the whole country looks pretty young.)

"Shut up!"

"No YOU shut up!"

"No. YOU. YOU shut up!"

"Mum! Muuuuummmm! Somchai just kicked me!"

"I did NOT!"

As soon as the bell sounds, though, they are completely nice to each other. There was a ring of sincerity (and maturity) about the way they smiles and patted each other on the back at the end of each round.

Fagin: "You'd like to make pocket handkerchiefs as easily as the Artful Dodger, wouldn't you my dear? "

Oliver Twist: "Yes, if you teach me sir."

Fagin: "We will, my dear, we will."

At the beginning of each fight there is a dance. Apparently this is for the fighters to pay respect to their teachers. If I taught boxing and my pupils came out and did this, I would be mortified:

Ummm. Excuse me? Do you work here? Which stadium is playing the fight? Oh. Are you sure?

If these were my students they would be in so much trouble. Embarrassed, even. I would be like "No! No! That's not what we practised at all!".

Like the Sydney Olympics Opening Ceremony, when Cathy Freeman lit the flame and it stalled on its way up to the cauldron.

I went out to check what this guy in the box was doing. I think it was a crossword. At least he wasn't smoking.

The worst part though? I actually, really, sincerely, wholeheartedly ...

Enjoyed it.

"Well you can tell by the way I use my walk"

I even enjoyed it when the blood came pissing out of the last guy's cheek. Maybe because. Maybe especially because. I don't know. I just liked it. It was fascinating and interesting and suspenseful. And violent. And I was a bit pissed by then.

"Mummy are two those men fighting?"

"Yes dear. Yes. Fighting. Now grab your bag we have to go. Quick!"

"But can't we stay to the end of this fight? You promised!"

"No. Hurry up. We're going to miss our train."

"But we don't catch a train."

"Don't talk back to your mother!"

Until then, I had no idea that's why they called it the ring.